The Hot Tamale

I hope that everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving break. I for one did and am now back in the saddle of my normal routine. So let's just get to it. The elephant in my room of life. Nutrition.

Nutrition has always been my biggest struggle. Hate it. Hate everything about it. Calorie counting, logging food, cooking holiday meals for friends and family and then sitting in front of a plate of bland chicken, rice, broccoli and a sugar free popsicle while they enjoy homemade macaroni and cheese, fried Turkey, candied sweet potatoes, collard greens with ham hocks and more variations of sweets than you can imagine.... just sinful. Lol!

In addition, eating healthy or "clean" (fitness trainer talk for "nothing good shall cross your lips") is much more difficult and expensive (if not planned out) than just eating in a normal manner. For example...after training, I must immediately consume a certain amount of protein and simple carbohydrates to replenish tired muscles resulting in muscle gain and fat loss. So one morning I had my protein powder with me, but forgot the oatmeal or fruit that I would normally bring.

No big deal. There is a Starbucks right next door, I can run in, grab something healthy and be done with it. I get to the counter avoiding the pastries with everything I've got. I grab the container of fruit, which is of course on the bottom shelf (conspiracy), then I hear it. The kindest, softest most comforting grandmotherly voice you can imagine.

"Hey Honey! How you been?"

I pretend not to hear as I impatiently wait behind a man ordering a series of coffee concoctions that I can't even pronounce.

"You look thin Chile. What you been eatin? What's that? Fruit? Sweet girl, that fruit ain't gonna fill you up. $3.95!? Sweet Mother Mary and all that's holy! That little bita fruit ain't worth 95 cent let alone $3.95! Come let Granny take care of you."

Okay, by now you know what's up. So who's talking? Yes, a donut. But not just any donut. A big, fat, doughy, glazed old fashioned. I just can't catch a break. Sigh....

"Baby, I'm only $1.85 and will fill you up longer than some ole fruit."

I'm proud to say, unlike with the sweet talking cinnamon roll, this time I declined the donut, purchased my fruit and raced out of the store. I was home free! I sat in my car and triumphantly downed my protein powder with water and ate the fruit. I won. I finally won! As I pulled away from the Fitness Together studio I was absolutely giddy. Lol! I got this!

Then I saw it.

On the floor of my car, just to the left of my emergency brake was ONE LONE HOT TAMALE!!! Come on!!! Now you wouldn't think that a crusty, nasty hot tamale dropped by Lord only knows who, laying on the floor being trampled for Lord only knows how long, would not be appealing. Well...I was cycling darn it and the thing nearly glowed in angelic light accompanied by the sounds of the heavens.

Now keep in mind that I'm driving at this time. I continue down the road waiting for the a stop light contemplating. Yes contemplating my next move!!!

"How dirty could it be? If nothing is stuck to it, the kids couldn't have put it in their mouths before they dropped it. So...Okay if nothing is stuck to it, I'll eat it. But if I eat it, it will just make me want more candy!! Maybe I could still eat it if it's hairy. That might actually make me never want to eat candy again if it's that disgusting. "Lol!

Yes, I laughed out loud at the time. Ludicrous. Not eating the hairy Hot Tamale, but being turned off of candy because of it. Lol!

The time had come.

"Crap...yellow light. Okay....Okay.... I can make it through. Darn! It's red."

I roll to a stop and without thinking, grab the hot tamale, roll down the window and throw it out.
"Goodbye little piece of joy. I will always love you."

Yes, I was two for two that morning. But it was only 9:30. sigh..
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I had actually planned to discuss my diet plan, with only a mention of this incident. But the story got away from me. Lol! I swear, it's true though, less the talking donut of course. LOLCC! Next time...I'll be serious and get into the nitty gritty of my diet plan. :) I guess you'd call this a classic case of avoidance.